RANT ALERT: Lesson these people can learn

F*CKIN HELL!! Right I’m on a rantaroid at the mo cause quite frankly I’m p1ssed with coming into work and nearly being sick on my keyboard every 5 minutes as the people here clearly do not know how to use one of these



You'd have thought with staggering engineering feats, fast paced modernisation, techno everything coming out of every available orifice (apart from its seems their f*ckin noses) and even those occupied ones they'd be masters of the art of engineering themselves to use a humble tissue… not so. A bit of a sniffle I can accommodate, even a wipe of the nose on the sleave.. go on, do it - feels gooooddd... but when the soundtrack to the working day is cacophony of white noise courtesy of


…Actually more like



…Its true Chinese water torture
Even a bit of hawking now and then – just to remind me of where I am …
I’m keen to give them the olfactory equivalent of a Colonic irrigation to clean their f*ckin sinuses out... Its not like little sniffles too its THICK HOT YELLOW SNOT and sometimes you can hear the solid pieces hitting the back of the throat.. no wonder they're all so thin.. all they seem to snack on is their own f*ckin muke!
My1: Can i have a good snuuurch
My2: Chuncks with that lah?
My1: Yes please!
My2: Now do you want dirty city chunks or just the bog standard moist jungle chunks?

I even offered the guy next to me tissues loads of times.. he just keeps looking at me weird and carrying on with his portable elevenses, lunch and afternoon tea

YUP - SICK ON KEYBOARD.

Surely this would not be the case (see below)if they stopped snurching.. TISSUES guys.. thats why Mr Kleenex became so RICH! As a great man once said YOWZER